America: More Sides, More Stories, More Content

I'm sure there are more reasons behind my being let go. As much as I try to do my very best at every job (no, really--at times it's kind of creepy, the degree to which I apply my work ethic to myself), I would be a fool to think things are ever simple.

The problem is, you can't go down that path because it leads you to wonder what the thing is that caused you to be terminated. I was looked right in the eye and told, "You're a wonderful person, and you know we mean that because you know we've had some really terrible people before...and I'm sure we will have them again. But we have to let you go." In other words, let a good person go and start fishing around for bad ones? Knowingly telling someone that you love them and want to get rid of them means:

a) They're lying, and they really think you're a terrible person. But they also think you'll shoot up the place. "What would get you to walk out that door? That's what I'm going to tell you."
b) They're lying, but they can't tell you what pushed you out (for example, the boss's cousin needs a job and yours will do just fine). Sometimes it'll pain them because they really do want to keep you, but it's out of their hands.
c) They thought you were a good person, but then something about you set off an alarm.


You have to watch that last one, because it will always grow behind your back, and you won't know until it hits you. It may hit you so hard you never got the license plate of the Thing That Ran You Down.

A good rule of thumb is to avoid talk that is not work-related. If I have to talk about myself or my thoughts or opinions outside of tech, I try to make it as neutral as if you'd read it on the news. Or parrot a similar thing, from a completely different context:

"Of course, other countries have done X with that idea instead of Y ...",
then nod in acknowledgement at the response and offer little to no opinion.

We can all stand to improve ourselves, but you can't stop to look back and find the unknowable because the wondering will drive you mad. It will lead you down wrong trails and cause you to second-guess yourself, and that can be fatal at your next interview.

You will always be yourself: just continue to try to be better at it, and that's all that matters.